This Dad Had One Task
All he had to do was push a button and he managed to screw that up. He pressed “code” instead of “call” and a time-strapped medical team had to report. Perhaps hanging out in the waiting room, like old school husbands, is a safer place for this new dad.
Back then, fathers were only expected in the delivery room when the new baby was cleaned up and neatly swaddled, ready to be held.
Epic Photo Flop
It is crazy that he would not have at least noticed the glaring background! To be honest, you have to hand it to this dad, at least somewhat. He was at the birth. He didn’t faint or vomit during delivery.
He had the sense to get some early pictures of his baby girl. He did everything right, except failing to check the background of the photos before he snapped them. Surely a picture or two was salvaged by cropping her out.
A Twist of Fate
Not helping! Postpartum recovery for this new mom surely was much worse due to her husband trying to show support. Good intentions, once again, were better left unsaid, or, in this case, untouched.
Can anyone imagine how bad this new dad must have felt after nearly breaking his wife’s ankle? How is she going to get up in the middle of the night to feed the baby? I guess he’ll be doing those midnight feedings.
Does anyone else get the sense that homeboy and mom are no longer married? Perhaps an incident like this had something to do with it? One can only guess. What’s most perplexing is how anyone can sleep that soundly.
Although, to his side, it was at the time most people hit R.E.M. sleep. And he was at the hospital with her. At least he was there for her, if only literally.
Limping On Game Day
A lot of times men like to equate their own physical pain with labor, as if it’s a competition. To women, it feels like they are minimizing an excruciating experience. In this case, hubby’s sore abdomen is no contest.
Which is probably why he had not brought it up in the first place. But actually, men are prone to show, not tell, acting out their pain by over-emphasizing, like he did, looking for attention. Kudos, though, for taking care of the toddler while mom’s going into labor.
You can depend upon a man to deliver an inappropriate joke during labor. He thinks he is very funny. But look at this case. Clearly, there was only one person in the delivery room who was laughing, and it was him.
Why do men always possess the propensity to, at precisely the worst time, crack a joke that is bad? I do not know, go ask your dad.
Really, Really, Not Helping
Such a simple task. . . We hope this husband didn’t intentionally do that incorrectly. If so, that’s a bad move to throw a soaking cloth onto the face of a person who is in dire need of some help at that time. Thankfully she got her words across strongly.
She sounds like a real trooper. We wonder if he’s still around, post-delivery.
In Case you Need Proof
This husband is lucky he was clear of hitting range when he dropped this bomb. And you can bet he was sure to be at that distance before dishing out such an inappropriate joke.
He said exactly the wrong words that he could possibly have said at that time. At least he didn’t pass out. Perhaps, making that comparison added to his ability to cope with the crazy reality that is childbirth.
Just Humor Him
What we have here is yet another dad attempting to be funny. He was probably hoping to break the tension in the delivery room. It was a tense time with the option of a C-section passed and the baby’s head too large to push through the birth canal.
Instead of easing the tension, he offended his wife right as she was delivering. Who could blame her? Cracking a joke while someone is in agony is never going to be appropriate.
A Dad’s Perspective
Exactly like that. A slimy, monster-sized endoparasitoid acid-spitting alien insect set on taking over the world bursts out of a caesarian section delivery. OK dad. Ha, ha, very funny.
It’s no secret the “Alien” screenwriter intentionally made a movie that taps into horror based on a man’s greatest fear, having to give birth. He said so himself.
I hope dad didn’t expect a groovy song and dance from his shriveled raisin. It’s been a long time since anyone has seen the California Raisins. We’d have to look back to the late- ‘80s to hear their rendition of Creedence Clearwater Revival’s, “I heard It Through the Grapevine.”
In the TV commercial, a bunch of Claymation raisins add lyrics, “Raised in the California Sunshine.” The ad was super-hot back then, but it sort of dates this dad now.
Old School Fatherhood
This is actually very typical of the times. Dads were not expected to go through the trauma of witnessing the birth process by being in the delivery room. And, in those pre-women’s rights days, they had the liberty of cracking crass jokes. Like, this man, making fun of the newborn.
It was the type of humor one could expect from twentieth-century dads. This grandpa is crotchety and bitter, from the same generation of men as Carl in “Up” before his happy transformation.
Everyone Knows a Hearty Cry Is a Sign of Health
The baby is crying, the father is screaming. The nurses are, like, we can only handle one screaming child. Bye, dad. This dude is on the long list of dads who are not helpful, who get in the way, and who really should not have been there in the first place.
Of course, it’s his right as a dad to be there, but allowing someone whose behavior could have critical consequences, like life-or-death situations, is not okay.
This New Dad Fail Was Not Exactly His Fault
It seems like dad deserves a pass on this one. But it begs the question, why was he snacking on a sammy once his wife was that far into labor? Not to be insensitive, choking is a serious condition, but he could have demonstrated better timing.
To his credit, if you think about it, he probably ended up choking because he was in such a hurry to finish it before the baby arrived.
What Is It With Dads and Sandwiches?
A man with an iron stomach, a rarity for dads-to-be, it has seemed. This dad is just chilling, grubbing on a sandwich, he’s watching and waiting. Only a tub of movie theater popcorn may have seemed like a more fitting spectator snack.
Compared to many dudes on this list, this dad is commendable. Even the doctor seems to think he is is a step above the rest.
A dad In Awe
Here, she is trying to focus on a very demanding task while hubby is freaking out, but in a good way. It is nice to see another dad who is not vomiting, who is not experiencing a vasovagal condition, and instead is admiring the true miracle that childbirth is.
We know there are at least two dads out there who are man enough to meet the challenge of the delivery room.
This is a good example of a new father with the best of intentions. He is just trying to help. Meanwhile, the wife is not having it because she is freaking out about going into labor.
When the water breaks, it is always the surest sign contractions and baby are approaching. However, one would think he would be cleaning up where his wife’s water broke if he was really such a neat nick.
Sergeant, Major Fail
Maybe this dad is not military brass, but he sure nailed a high-ranking dad-fail. He nailed it right into his thumb. This, undoubtedly, is one of the dumbest things we have ever seen an expecting father do.
Not only did he miss the baby’s birth, but he also could not even fill out the birth certificate form. Dad, we’re going to need you to focus. Next time.
A Birthing Room Story
Three months of Lamaze instruction laid to waste. This dad tale comes from the perspective of the birthing nurse. Her daughter is relaying the time one of the dads in the delivery room suffered a vasovagal attack and was on the floor passed out.
The mother was clearly mortified by the unmanly condition of her husband. Here, she is going through the worst pain ever while he is unable to perform the simple task of standing.
The Epidural Needle Strikes Again
Yet another dad is dragged up off the delivery room floor for fainting. It is a long needle. We get it. But delivery had not even begun, and he’s already laid out on the floor.
And this dad is out cold. It was not simply a woozy feeling that overcame him and forced him to sit down. He lost consciousness completely. Which, presumably, is fortunate for this guy since he was spared from hearing all the nurses in the room laugh at him.
Branded with a Star
We’re not labeling moving boxes here. Dad is marking his territory on a newborn infant. To be fair, infant swaps have happened. It is rare, but in the U.S. eight baby switch incidents occurred between 1995 and 2008.
Now that DNA is easily tracked, we can see proof of baby swaps. In 2021 a Spanish woman found she was not related to her parents by a DNA analysis. She had been switched at the maternity ward in 2002. She sued.
So Close to Heroic
What a mess! He retched all over the delivery room floor. Makes you wonder which is more disgusting. Baby gunk or vomit? But the dad did step in at a crucial time.
He caught the baby and gave it to a nurse, the handoff was swifter than a quarterback on the line of scrimmage with the clock ticking. At that point he might have secured the title of dad hero, but no, he blew it.
Another Dad Bites the Dust
It is true that some husbands don’t like it when their wife is getting the bulk of the attention. Some men do want to make it all about them. It seems like they’re working it to score some extra sympathy action.
This guy, however, legit passed out from the “official-sounding malady of vagus nerve overactivity,” a.k.a., a vasovagal medical condition. It’s safe to say that this was probably not the attention he was looking for.
And Another One Down
Who knew Dads are so swoon-prone? Do they faint all the time or just when they witness their child coming into the world? Maybe there needs to be some sort of preventative care for dads in delivery rooms.
Along with Lamaze, he ought to be practicing breathing techniques or whatever it takes to prevent dad from hitting the floor.
Dads Think They Are So Funny
Why are men so prone to inappropriate humor at the hospital? Nerves, maybe? This time the bad dad joke came back around to bite him. If only we could have seen the expression on his face after he said he is feeling sorry for the baby’s parents.
One would presume his “silly grin’ was wiped right off his mug right about then. That loud baby was his own.
When a woman is in labor, it’s time to focus on her. These men, who should be supporting this woman at this time, are paying more attention to NFL Sunday.
It is true that it is game time in the delivery room, this woman is in labor, and she needs some fans cheering for team “new baby.” But they’re all watching the Bears instead.
He Can’t Hide His Crying Eyes
This dad was sobbing and sobbing instead of fainting like other men. As far as dad fails go, this one was adorable. When he first laid eyes on his baby boy, he was overwhelmed with joy and awe.
There’s something sweet about a man who is not afraid to bawl his eyes out at an emotional occasion. The miracle of birth affects everyone a little differently.
Dad Thinks she is an Alien?
That’s one way to welcome your baby girl into the world. One dad is crying tears of joy at seeing his baby for the first time, and this one is totally freaked out and scared.
It’s difficult to imagine someone screaming, “Don’t touch it!” about an infant whose first need is to be swaddled and held. But apparently, these things happen.
Surprise, Surprise, Dad Delivers a Bad Joke
Sigh. This guy took labor coaching to a whole new level, but it was not appreciated. However, it is nice to know that nurses stand up for moms who have obnoxious husbands who cannot stop themselves from bringing unsuitable humor into the delivery room.
He thought he made mom laugh during a contraction, but isn’t mom laughing at him because of the nurse’s response? He’ll take credit for a laugh anyway he can get it.
One Size Does Not Fit All
Husbands in delivery rooms seem to embarrass wives somehow, someway, all the time. This time he did it totally by accident, so he probably deserves a pass.
Her husband is going to hear about this story for the rest of his life, and same with the child who will grow up with the story about the time his dad’s pants ripped in the delivery room.
‘Push It Real Good’
This made the CBS News? Perhaps it was a slow news night. Meanwhile, however, this “push it” story went viral with the family, singing an a cappella chorus rendition of the Salt-N-Peppa song.
It cheered on the birth of their third sibling. The video from the December 2019 birth racked up 9.6 million views at one point. Presumably singing in the delivery room was not breaking the rules. But it worked. Ten minutes later the baby arrived. Mom, however, was not a fan.
Dad: Wait, Don’t Push Yet
To boldly go where no man has gone before. Childbirth, the final frontier. Maybe that’s how dealing with labor and having a child felt for this new dad. I’m sure mom was not thrilled with having to wait until the TV was on the right channel to start pushing.
At least he demonstrated some class and didn’t flip to a football game.
This Dad is Lucky to Have Survived Childbirth
Dads: choose your words carefully in the delivery room. Never minimize the pain she is feeling. And never, ever, ever say to a woman in labor, “So, it really hurts that bad?”
Instead, say things like, “What can I do to help you at this time?” or “Can I get you anything?” On second thought, maybe, saying nothing at all is best.
What NOT to Say if You’re a New Dad
Yet another example of what not to say in front of your wife in the delivery room. This guy could have at least waited a week or so to ask when his wife could get back to the gym, instead, he waited a mere hour before hoping to get her on an exercise routine.
It looks like there is probably a really good reason he is known as “the ex.”
Baby’s Gender Reveal Moment is Bungled by Dad
Oof. The umbilical cord is known to be mistaken in an ultrasound for a boy’s gender projection. That is why girls are more frequently accidentally identified as male. It is not as frequent to mistake baby boy parts once the baby is in front of our eyes.
But, you know, dads are sometimes overly hopeful. It can be embarrassing.
He needed his beauty rest, apparently. This is the same new dad who won’t wake up when the baby is screaming in the middle of the night, one can only presume. Perhaps he will tell the infant to shush and roll over and go back to sleep.
But first he will inevitably wake the sleeping mom who is finally getting some rest from the last feeding, and tell her the baby is crying, go take care of it. These guys are so predictable!
This Is One of the Absolute Worst Comments a Dad Can Make
This lady has one mean husband. While the new mom cries about getting her first C-section, dad tells her that getting this painful procedure that involves a mighty incision in the abdomen so that a large baby comes out, is the “easy way.” Because of the very muscular area of the abdomen, it is an extremely painful area to heal.
This guy’s commentary is not just rude, it’s sadistic.
He’s ready to cut costs instead of feeling the pinch in his wallet. However, you know that if he was in as much pain as his wife, he’d find the cash, in a minute. He could have at least told her he thinks that the procedure might be too risky, that he doesn’t want to chance paralysis if it goes wrong.
He could’ve acted like he cared about her suffering, but no.
Hilarious Dad Fail
How did this father not notice? A woman swollen huge with the baby was supposed to be sitting next to him in the passenger seat, instead, it was empty. Was he talking to her?
Didn’t he notice she didn’t answer? I am sure he made good time though, speeding off without her.
Makes Himself at Home
One reply to this actual tweet a dad posted suggested that the dad should name the kid after the “person you’re playing against while the delivery is going on.” Dad response? ‘You’re a genius.’ He has his priorities; you have to hand him that.
But, honestly, waiting for baby to be born can be a long, drawn-out affair. It can take 12 to 19 hours, and sometimes as long as 40 hours.
Homer Simpson would be proud of this dad. It is not as big of a dad fail as driving off to the hospital without his wife on board, but this one did go back two times to get the stuff she wanted to have with her in the delivery room.
And, yet, even after the second trip home, he returned empty-handed. Except for a bunch of stuff no one wanted.
Feeling Kind of Queasy
Yet another man having a vasovagal reaction. So, dad is enjoying snack time, courtesy of the nurse, while his wife, in labor, is starving. Granted, those epidural needles are very long, but who is the one getting pierced?
Who is the one going through labor? Dude, man up.
Another dad co-opts the nurse staff’s attention. Why couldn’t he call Door Dash or something? If the nurse wanted to be a waitress, she would have gotten a job at a restaurant. At least he did not make his wife go get him a soda, but this guy probably thought about it.
He must have remembered, with a jolt, that this is not about him, punctuated by his wife’s mid-labor screams. So he deferred to the nurse instead.
This guy did not even make it to the delivery room before blowing chunks. And his girlfriend really needed his support. Vomiting is not voluntary, to be sure, but why do we think men are tough?
Why do we think they are always in command and confident? Because that’s how they act. This guy’s act was up, barfing all the way to the hospital just because her water broke.
Deep Thoughts of a New Dad
First of all, let’s hope he means to say that his wife is the hero, because she is the only person in the room who is doing anything heroic. This armchair-athlete is a far cry from the exalted word he seems to claim.
At any rate, you have to agree that this dad’s pondering sounds exactly like it was ripped directly from watching “The Office” reruns. You know, those times when they break the fourth wall by looking into the camera to say something.
Photographic Evidence of Dads Fainting
Very traumatic. I hope these dads don’t develop delivery room P.T.S.D.! There may be some siblings on the way eventually, so we don’t want these dads to keep on fainting during labor. But if you did not believe that dads frequently pass out during childbirth, there are images prove it.
Tough guys swoon as much as anyone, apparently.
Who Is the Patient Here?
He’s on the verge of passing out, though the medical term vasovagal makes it seem like it’s more than just nausea. But the point is, he is bogarting the attention of the nursing staff from the birthing mother. At least he felt guilty about it.
Maybe this is why they used to keep new dads in the waiting room. How can the staff focus on the delivery if dads are always in need of care?
This dad fail happened before he even got into the delivery room. Attention to detail is clearly not his strength. We’re just glad he was not the one in charge of getting mom to the right hospital. But it’s sad that he didn’t make it in time to witness the birth of his baby.
Mom could have used some support too.
Husbands often mean well, but they don’t always have exactly the right words to comfort a wife in labor. He wanted to know how she was doing. It seems like he got his answer, but he definitely did not give the support he thought he was giving her at that time.
Let’s just hope she didn’t rip out too much of his hair. If he has any more questions, he will likely stand at a safe distance.