Already stupid rich before the coronavirus pandemic shut off economic opportunities for millions of people across the country and the globe, Bezos had the perfect business model for such a situation. No one could go shopping, so where did they turn? Amazon, of course. And in October 2020, we all got a glimpse of just how much money Bezos actually made while others lost jobs and homes. Journalist Anand Giridharadas told NPR that during the pandemic, Jeff Bezos made so much money that he could now give each of his 876,000 Amazon employees across the globe a $105,000 bonus and still walk away with the same outrageous fortune he had before the pandemic began. However, missing out on a hypothetical hundred-grand bonus check isn’t even at the top of the list of the worst things about being an Amazon employee. 

In April 2021, CBS News reported that Amazon had apologized for initially denying that it worked its employees so hard that they had to pee in water bottles. But according to Giridharadas’ math, Bezos not only could have afforded to give his workers bathroom breaks, he could have paid them better, as well. A lot better. But hey, at least they helped their man-child boss fly his rocket ship into space for a few minutes. Here’s hoping that seeing outer space will somehow inspire a bit more generosity in Bezos, or at least the decency to give the ones who make all his money for him a bathroom break every now and then.